Venting

So, I had my first pregnancy breakdown today. Poor Brian had to calm me down while I was sobbing to him on the phone and then told him that I didn't really know why I was crying. I think there are many things that led up to/contribute to this breakdown.

1. I am EXHAUSTED! I am teaching 24, very rambunctious students this year and it is a hard job. I am also doing my master's so when I get home from teaching, I do homework of my own. I am starting to not sleep at night because my lower back feels like an iron pole is sticking into it no matter what position I lay in.

2. I have a coworker who does not love that I am pregnant and is now waiting for me to make mistakes and when I do, she points them out with hurtful comments that a person can only take so much of.

3. I threw up last night for the third time in 3 days and I am discouraged because I thought that phase was over, especially since I am on medication for it.

4. I am trying to be the perfect wife, friend, daughter, person and it is not working out for me.

5. I am pregnant and my emotions are ALL OVER THE PLACE. I try to control them, but they have a mind of their own.

I LOVE this baby so much already and am so excited to be pregnant. Do not misunderstand this vent session for regret or unhappiness. I have the world's best husband who is doing everything he knows how to do to help make me happy. I love him so much more for that. No one told me the hard things about pregnancy. I am just learning it on my own and learning so much about myself in the process. It will be fun to hold that cute baby in 5 and 1/2 short months.